What do you think of my essay?

Hi, I'm a 15 year old writing an essay for my 10th grade History Honors class. I was supposed to answer the question "Do you think Reconstruction was a success?" What do you think of my essay?



Reconstruction



When the confederates finally surrendered in Appomattox, ending the civil war, nobody knew what was to be done. The truth is, nobody wanted to participate in such a muddled situation. After decades of conflict and argument, the Union was finally assembled, but one situation remained the same – blacks continued serving white southerners on their plantations. Debates regarding Reconstruction have been going on for generations among many historians – was it a success or an epic failure? Perhaps it was both, yet leaning toward failure would be more legitimate. It is in my opinion that Reconstruction was more of a failure than success, but I will admit that some aspects of the Reconstruction were a success. Did the North really intend on bringing equality to the blacks during the Reconstruction period? Some historians like to debate that the North only had the intent to bring the Union back together, so it did not qualify for failure – but was this really the case?



Reconstruction was successful, yet only vaguely, in several ways. Northerners had a moral hatred for slavery and hoped to abolish it completely in the South. By passing the 13th Amendment, Congress was finally able to end slavery, freeing slaves. For the first time, African Americans were able to leave their plantations. Some were anxious and couldn’t bring themselves to leave their plantations due to the fact that they didn’t know where to go. Others were jubilant, and took advantage of this opportunity – they traveled around the nation and some even re-united with their families. Meanwhile, Southern state conventions were being held to try and limit their freedom by adopting the “Black Codes.” This contract took away the right’s of African Americans, and put slavery under a new name. Giving the slaves freedom was just too over-whelming for the South – they had depended on slavery for decades; socially, politically, and most importantly, economically. Letting go of slavery could not have been such an easy process, especially for the southerners.



Despite the fact that the South was not ready to reform, the North just continued adopting bills like “The Freedmen’s Bureau”, “The Civil Rights Bill”, and “The Fourteenth Amendment”, which was vetoed by Johnson, but overrode by Congress. This was a great success during Reconstruction because it provided slaves with many different opportunities. “The Freedmen’s Bureau” extended the amount of activities for former slaves, while “The Fourteenth Amendment” declared African Americans the rights of citizens. “The Fifteenth Amendment” took this to the next level by granting African American males the right to vote.



This was just too much for many white southerners so discrimination groups, such as the “Ku Klux Klan”, were created to try and keep former slaves from enjoying their rights. Another problem for former slaves was the fact that they couldn’t find jobs, or even a place to stay – this was due to the lack of money for former slaves. Conditions for them were not improved, and it may even have worsened. The government of the Union was in chaos, and soon after Thaddeus Stevens died, many people decided to allow the white southerners to govern their selves. Of course, this meant the South would remain being divided into two nations made up of the “superior” and “inferior” race. The government was basically in chaos; financially, economically, and politically.



Reconstruction officially ended when all the federal troops in the South were withdrawn. African Americans remained in their depressive state as they were deprived of their many rights. Northerners did, in fact, intend on bringing equality to southern blacks during Reconstruction; this means that it is qualified for failure. Though Reconstruction should mostly be considered as failure, some components brought success. An attempt to give equality to African Americans was made, while slavery was completely destroyed. Reconstruction should not be labeled as “failure” or “success” because some intentions of it were fulfilled, while other aspects of the Union remained the same.What do you think of my essay?
Your essay is good - it gives a bunch of examples relating the events of the Reconstruction to the success/failure of the overall movement. However, here are a few tips I would suggest:

-- First, don't use questions in your essay. If you want to say something, then say it. Don't ask, but tell your reader what you think.

-- Second, develop a STRONG THESIS. Although you talk about many important parts of Reconstruction, I failed to find your overall point. Did you think it was successful or a failure? Decide, and clearly state this in your thesis paragraph. Your thesis statement should state "The Reconstruction was successful/unsuccessful because..." (you can fluff it up, but that's the basics.)

-- Lastly, after you come up with a strong thesis, make sure all your points support your thesis. I noticed you had good things that came out of the Reconstruction, but you also mentioned problems. Although there were both sides, you should focus on which side was stronger and go on that. It's okay to mention that not everything was perfect, but a paragraph contradicting your thesis would not be good.



Good luck! Nice job on the essay.